A parent called me a couple days ago & asked about the TEFRA Medicaid program & how does someone become eligible for this particular program. So after telling her about how my son, Brandon, qualified & how he became eligible, I thought it would be best for posting this information on our POPS blog..
My son, Brandon, has been on the TEFRA program for about 7 years now. I was working at the DMV-Department of Motor Vehicles at the time. I was discussing Brandon's medical & school issues with a co-worker, when a parent came in to renew her license. This parent told me about this particular program & all I could think was, "I will never qualify, I make too much money". What I didn't realize was, qualifying didn't go by how much money I or my husband made, it went by how much Brandon made.
As I was talking to her, she gave me a phone number to receive a TEFRA application. Well, after filling out the application, adding in all the necessary paperwork, a nurse visiting our home, me calling just about everyday to ask,"When are we getting qualified." & 7 months later, Brandon finally qualified.
All I can say is, Please be the squeaky wheel that gets the oil kind of person or they will certainly deny you from qualifying. I made a point to call them everyday or at least every other day to ask about Brandon's eligibility status.. It might have took 7 months to qualify, but he didn't get denied..
Here is information about the TEFRA Medicaid program:
"Katie Beckett" TEFRA Children
Under Section 134 of the Tax Equity and Fiscal Responsibility Act of 1982 (TEFRA), (P.L.97-248), states were allowed to make Medicaid benefits available to certain disabled children who would not ordinarily be eligible for Supplemental Security Income (SSI) benefits because of their parent's income or resources. South Carolina began covering these children effective January 1, 1995.
Eligibility:
To be eligible, a child must meet the following requirements:
* Be age 18 or under;
* live at home;
* meet the SSI definition of disability;
* have gross monthly income below $2,022 and countable resources at or below $2,000 (only the child's income and resources are counted);
* meet an institutional level of care. The three levels of care are intermediate care for the mentally retarded (ICF-MR), nursing facility (skilled or intermediate care) or hospital care. Meeting a level of care does not mean a child must be institutionalized (see above);
* it must be appropriate to provide care to the child at home; and
* The estimated cost of caring for the child outside the institution does not exceed the estimated cost of treating the child in the institution.
Benefits:
A child who meets these requirements is eligible for the full range of Medicaid covered services. If the child needs special services, which are available only under the home and community based waiver, they must apply for and be accepted into one of the waiver programs to receive these special services.
Applications may be obtained from the county Department of Social Services office in the child's county of residence or by contacting the TEFRA Coordinator in Columbia at (803) 898-2997 or statewide at the toll-free number: 1-888-549-0820. The completed application should be mailed to:
Department of Health and Human Services Attention: TEFRA Coordinator Post Office Box 100101 Columbia, South Carolina 29202-3101
The online TEFRA Application:
Please click here for the online TEFRA application
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Monday, May 18, 2009
Bullying Is Not A Fact of Life!
A parent called me this morning and wanted to know if I had any information on Bullying.. It seems her 13 year old special needs son is being bullied at public school by a 15 year old typical boy. Her son is coming home almost everyday with bruises from punches and seems very depressed from the everyday abuse. It also seems that the public school educators have not seen any of this abuse take place and is not willing to work with this parent to stop the abuse from reoccuring.
So, with that in mind, I thought I would gather up some information concerning Bullying that might help parents who may be dealing with the same issues as this parent. I copied this information from www.samhsa.gov. It is from a booklet entitled, "Bullying Is Not A Fact of Life".
Bullying is a form of ABUSE.
HARASSMENT AND VIOLENCE. Harassment and abuse are more accurate names for it. Parents and school personnel should no longer consider bullying “just a part of growing up.” It is harmful to both the perpetrators and the victims and is responsible for behavioral and emotional difficulties, long-term negative outcomes, and violence.
Most people know what bullies are.
They even know what problems victims of bullies sometimes face: years of constant anxiety, insecurity, and low self-esteem. Yet bullying problems OFTEN ARE ignored or denied.
Large numbers of students have been bullied over long periods of time while nobody paid any attention! Today, however, more people are recognizing that it is a basic democratic right for a student to feel secure at school and not to be troubled by offensive and humiliating treatment. Because of highly publicized school incidents, we now know that ignoring bullying can lead to violence or make a victim feel so overwhelmed that he or she sees suicide as the only way out.
No student should be afraid to go to school because of bullying, and no parent should be worried that their child may be bullied.
Some Facts About Bullying Among Children and Young People
Generally, we call it bullying when one or more persons repeatedly say or do hurtful things to another person who has problems defending himself or herself. Direct bullying usually involves hitting, kicking, or making insults, offensive and sneering comments, or threats.
Repeatedly teasing someone who clearly shows signs of distress is also recognized as bullying. However, indirect bullying—the experience of being excluded from a group of friends, being spoken ill of and being prevented from making friends—can be just as painful.
Most bullying takes place at the same grade level. However, many times older students bully younger students. Although direct bullying is a greater problem among boys, a good deal of bullying takes place among girls. Bullying between girls, however, involves less physical violence and can be more difficult to discover. Girls tend to use indirect and subtle methods of bullying, such as exclusion from a group of friends, backbiting, and manipulation of friendships. Far more boys than girls bully, and many girls are mostly bullied by boys, but both can be victims of bullying.
These three conditions create a bullying situation:
*Negative or malicious behavior.
*Behavior repeated over a period of time.
*A relationship in which there is an imbalance in strength or power between the parties involved.
Fact: How Much Bullying Goes On?
Major studies in Norway in the 1980s and 1990s with more than 150,000 students found that about 15 percent of students in primary and lower secondary school, or approximately one in seven students, were involved in bullying with a degree of regularity—as a victim, as a bully, or both. At least 5 percent (more than 1in 20) of all students were involved in more serious bullying at least once a week.
In the United States in 1998, the prevalence of bullying was found to be even more substantial. A study carried out with a national sample of more than 15,000 students in grades 6 through 10 found about 30 percent of the sample reported moderate or frequent involvement in bullying—as a bully, as a victim, or both. Students in middle school (grades 6 through 8) reported greater frequency of bullying than did students in grades 9 and 10.
Similar results were obtained in another study of more than 6,000 middle school students in rural South Carolina. About 23 percent reported that they had been bullied by other students “several times” or more frequently during the past three months.
Approximately 20 percent reported that they had bullied other students with the same frequency.
Fact: Where Does Bullying Take Place?
The claim is sometimes made that most bullying takes place on the way to school, not at school. However, research shows that two to three times as many students are bullied at school compared to those who are bullied on the way to school.
Approximately 40 to 75 percent of bullying takes place during breaks—in the schoolyard, in the corridors, at recess, or in more secluded places, like bathrooms. It can also take place during classes unless the teacher is attentive and cracks down on any tendencies toward bullying. Without a doubt, school is the place where most bullying occurs. This puts particular responsibility on school leaders and teachers. It is clear that the behavior, attitudes, and routines of teachers and other school personnel have a decisive effect on the extent of bullying in the individual school or class. Of course, parents, caregivers and supervisors in many other places—in kindergartens, playgrounds, and sports and youth clubs, for example—also need to be alert to detect bullying or tendencies toward bullying.
Fact: Who Gets Bullied?
Research gives a fairly clear picture of those who are potential victims of bullying. They tend to have at least one, or usually several, of the characteristics listed below. These lists only indicate main trends; in some cases, victims may be quite different. Potential victims of bullying can be divided into two main groups:
The passive or submissive victim
Most children in this category are not aggressive or teasing in their manner and usually do not actively provoke others in their surroundings. However, passive victims of bullying generally signal, through their behavior and attitudes, that they are a bit anxious and unsure of themselves.
Detailed interviews with parents of bullied boys predominantly of the passive/ submissive type indicate that these boys were characteristically rather careful and sensitive from an early age. Having this kind of personality (possibly in addition to physical weakness) may have made it difficult for them to assert themselves in their group of playmates, which may have contributed to these boys becoming victims of bullying. At the same time, it is obvious that long-term bullying probably increased their anxiety, insecurity, and negative self-image.
The features that can be seen in long-suffering victims of bullying may be both a cause for, and a result of, being bullied.
*These students are usually quiet, careful, sensitive, and may start crying easily.
*They are unsure of themselves and have poor self confidence (negative self-image).
*The boys in this group do not like to fight, and they are often physically weaker than their classmates, especially the bullies.
*They have few or no friends.
The provocative victim
This category is less common and accounts for only about 10 to 20 percent of the victims.
A class with a provocative victim of bullying generally has somewhat different problems than a class with a passive victim. It is more common that a number of students, sometimes the whole class, may be involved in harassing the provocative victim.
*They may themselves try to bully weaker students.
*They can be quick tempered and may try to retaliate if they are attacked or harassed, but often without much success.
*They are often restless, clumsy, immature, unable to concentrate, and generally considered difficult.
*Some may be characterized as hyperactive (unsettled and restless because of concentration difficulties) and often have reading/writing problems.
*They may also be disliked by adults—their teacher, for example—because of their irritating behavior.
Fact: Who Bullies?
Children and young people who are potential bullies have a number of common features. Again, it must be emphasized that these points are just the main trends. All the same, it is likely that an active bully will have one or more of the following characteristics.
It has often been presumed that bullies are anxious and unsure of themselves underneath their tough surface. However, research finds that bullies are characterized by either unusually low or about average levels of anxiety and insecurity. Their self-image is also about average or even relatively positive.
Some bullies are popular, others are not. A bully will often have a group of two or three friends who provide him or her with support and often join in the bullying. However, the popularity of the bully lessens at the higher class/grade levels.
*They view violence more favorably than most students do.
*They are often aggressive toward adults, both parents and teachers.
*They have a marked need to dominate and suppress other students, to assert themselves by means of force and threats, and to get their own way.
*Boys in this group are often stronger than their peers and, in particular, their victims.
*They are often hot-tempered, impulsive, and not very tolerant of obstacles and delays (frustrations).
*They find it difficult to fit in with rules.
*They appear to be tough and show little sympathy toward students who are bullied.
*They are good at talking their way out of difficult situations.
“The Real Story”
For 2 years, Sam, a quiet 13-year-old, was a human plaything for some of his classmates. The teenagers badgered Sam for money, forced him to swallow weeds and drink sour milk, beat him up in the rest room, and tied a string around his neck and led him around as a “pet.” When Sam’s torturers were asked about the bullying, they said they pursued their victim because “it was fun.”
Fact: Group Bullying
Bullying MAY ALSO BE a group phenomenon with particular characteristics. This means that there are a number of children and young people who may at times be involved in bullying, but who would not usually take the initiative themselves. These are called passive bullies, henchmen, or bystanders. The group of passive bullies is quite mixed and may include uncertain or anxious students.
Some of the mechanisms THAT may be active in group bullying are:
Social contagion
Some students may be influenced to take part in bullying if the student leading the bullying is someone they admire. Children or young people who are themselves somewhat insecure and who want to assert themselves are mostly the ones who join in.
Weakening of normal controls
If neither the teachers nor the other students try to stop bullying, the bully or bullies are rewarded through their “victory” over their victim. This can contribute to weakening the controls against the aggressive tendencies of neutral students and may contribute to their participation in bullying.
Decreased sense of individual responsibility
Social psychology notes that a person’s sense of individual responsibility for a negative action such as bullying may be considerably reduced when several people participate. In this way, students who are usually nice, but easily influenced, can at times take part in bullying without particular misgivings.
Gradual changes in the perception of the victim of bullying
As a result of repeated attacks and degrading comments, the victim will gradually be perceived as a fairly worthless person who almost “begs to be beaten up.” This also results in lesser feelings of guilt in those who are taking part in the bullying and may be part of the explanation of why other students do not try to stop the harassment of the victim.
Q&A: How do I find out if my child is being bullied?
FIRST:
You need to have frequent conversations with your child or adolescent to ask about what happens at school. Establishing a relationship helps you keep the lines of communication open and gives you a sense of context for what your child or adolescent experiences day-to-day.
SECOND:
If you get a note from your child’s school saying that he or she is being bullied by the other students, take it seriously. The problem is, however, that you cannot always be sure that the school/teachers will discover that your child is having this sort of problem or that they realize how serious a situation is. Neither can you expect that your child will necessarily talk about problems of this nature to you. There can be various reasons for this. Your child may feel that being bullied is a personal defeat, or he or she may have received threats from the bullies. The child may have tried before to tell an adult about the bullying and may not have been given any real help. He or she may be afraid that involving adults will make the bullying even worse. Therefore, you must be particularly sensitive to signs and changes in your child.
It is important that you do not try to explain away your child’s problems and hope that they will go away by themselves. It has been clearly documented that bullying can negatively impact a child’s formative years as well as later adult life. Research suggests that systematic bullying can leave deep psychological scars which can lead to depressive attitudes and a tendency toward negative self-image, even years after the bullying has ended.
Q&A: What are the Warning Signs?
Your Child–
*Comes home with torn, dirty, or wet clothes or damaged books, or “loses” things without being able to give a proper explanation of what has happened.
*Has bruises, injuries, cuts, and scratches and cannot give a credible explanation for what caused them.
*Loses interest in school and gets poorer grades.
*Does not bring classmates home and rarely spends time with classmates after school.
*Seems afraid or unwilling to go to school in the morning.
*Chooses an “illogical” route to and from school.
*Seems unhappy, downhearted, depressed, or has mood swings with sudden outbursts of irritation or anger.
*Often has little appetite, headaches, or stomach aches.
*Sleeps restlessly with nightmares and possibly cries in his/her sleep.
*Steals or asks for extra money from members of the family (to soften up the bullies)
Q&A: How do I find out whether my child is bullying?
It can be difficult to discover and to acknowledge that your own child is a bully. Bullying other students is obviously not something a child will talk about at home. But if several of the points described under “Who Bullies?” fit your child, you should take this seriously and look more closely into the matter.
Bullying can be seen as a part of a general pattern of anti-social and rule-breaking behavior. Children who are bullies during their school years are at a much higher risk of later becoming involved in crime, misuse of alcohol, tobacco, and illegal drugs. If your child is bullying others, it is important to break this pattern, not just for the sake of the victim, but also for your own child’s sake.
Who Bullies?
Your Child–
*Has a marked need to dominate or manipulate others.
*Is aggressive, nasty, spiteful, and generally in opposition.
*Seems to like to insult, push around, or tease other children.
What Can parents Do?
If you suspect or it is obvious that your child is being bullied by other students and the school has not already informed you of the situation, then it is important that you contact the school immediately. Parents should have the right to expect the school to take this seriously and to investigate the facts in the case. This will usually involve talks with you and your child, with the suspected bully or bullies and with other students in the class. Also, if appropriate, talks with a number of other parents (for example, the parents of the bullies) who may have important information to contribute.
Once the facts are on the table, a detailed plan must be drawn up of how you and the school together can put an end to the bullying.
Although it is important that home and school work together in cases of bullying, it must be emphasized that the school should take the main responsibility to initiate and coordinate the work involved in counteracting bullying in school.
Some parents who have approached schools with their worries and suspicions about their child being bullied have had the door closed in their faces with comments such as “there isn’t any bullying at our school” or “you are worrying about nothing.” If you are reasonably sure that your child is being bullied, a good starting point for taking up the situation with the school can be to ask your child (along with you, if it seems appropriate) to keep a concise log book describing the incidents of harassment or bullying—when they occurred, who took part, and what was said and done. Then you can make a more concrete presentation when you contact the school. It can be a good idea, too, to discuss the situation with the parents of other children in the class. If they have also reported problems with bullying, it will, of course, be easier to urge the school to act.
Parents: Don’t Give Up!
Sometimes bullied students do not want their parents to talk with school officials. Victims often do not want to be the center of attention and are afraid of getting the bully into trouble by telling adults about what is going on. In many cases, these children have also been threatened with increased bullying if they tell. Threats cause many victims of bullying to suffer in silence or to pressure their parents not to contact the school.
In most cases, however, you are doing your child a dis-service if you do not pursue the issue. If your child will not agree to your suggestions out of fear, you must still take responsibility for sorting out the problem. Most bullied children eventually feel a great sense of relief when the situation finally comes out into the open. From a long-term perspective, it is also detrimental to the bullies when their behavior is overlooked. If the situation is properly dealt with, the bully will be helped, too.
Parents: Let the School Arrange a Meeting
Once bullying has been discovered, the school should contact the parents of both the victim(s) and the bullies to inform them and to try to establish constructive cooperation. Since a victim’s parents usually should not contact the bully’s parents directly, the school could arrange a meeting at which the students, as well as their parents, are present. The aim of such a meeting is to bring about a thorough discussion of the situation and to arrive at a concrete plan of action. If the bully has damaged the victim’s clothes or other possessions, it would be reasonable to bring up the question of compensation. Another aim must be to try to establish a collaboration with the parents of the bully/ies and to get them to exert their influence over their children in a purposeful way.
Many parents of students who bully others have little idea of what their child has been doing at school. When the situation is clarified for them, a number of parents want to contribute to bringing about positive changes. On the other hand, some bullies’ parents try to play down the problems and generally take a defensive stand. They may not even come to meetings designed to address the problem. Even if it is not possible to establish any reasonably positive communication with some parents, a serious attempt to do so must still be made. In any case, the bully’s parents must be kept informed about the situation.
The initial meeting should not be a one-time event. It should be followed up with more meetings so that the development of the situation can be further evaluated and information can be exchanged between parents and teachers.
It is, of course, also important to check that any decisions that have been made are being put into action. Under favorable circumstances, relatively positive relations can develop between the parents of bullies and the parents of the victim. This can be an important step in putting an end to the bullying.
Sometimes, however, it is clear in advance that the relationship between the bullies’ and the victim’s families is tense and hostile. In such situations, it is sensible to hold meetings with one family at a time before possibly arranging a joint meeting, and it may be necessary to involve the school social worker, counselor, or psychologist.
Parents: Make Sure the Bullied Child Gets Effective Protection
One thing must be made absolutely clear when an attempt is being made to resolve a bullying situation—the victim of bullying must be guaranteed effective protection. Close follow-up is needed until the danger of new attempts at bullying has passed. Teachers and school administrators have a special responsibility to safeguard the victim at school. The bullied student must be able to trust that the adults are both willing and capable of providing the help he or she needs. If bullying problems are taken up in class in a rushed or casual manner, without ensuring that the victim is given solid protection against further harassment, the situation will almost always become worse. In order to provide the bullied student with sufficient security, close cooperation and frequent exchange of information is usually needed between the school and the student’s family.
Having a child who is bullied means seeing your child become an outcast, frozen out, and completely isolated. Most of what you read is about bullies and victims who are boys. Bullying is also found among girls, but it is not so obvious from the outside. It is not usually a matter of damaged clothes or bruised arms and legs. Bullying among girls bypasses physical pain and goes right into the soul. Bullying among girls is less concrete or visible.
How can I as a mother, accuse the girls bullying my 14-year-old daughter for having stopped phoning, for not saying hello, for speaking badly of her behind her back, for changing places in the classroom, for always commenting on and making fun of what she says, etc. Nothing they do (or don’t do) is against the rules.
As a mother, I have a great sense of grief and helplessness in the face of what my daughter has to go through. In desperation, I have tried to talk to the mothers of two of my daughter’s previous friends. It wasn’t particularly helpful; some parents just can’t accept that their children are criticized by outsiders. They defend their children at any cost, no matter how ridiculous this may be.
I wouldn’t wish the grief and helplessness I feel on any parents, but I wish you and your children could actually feel just for a short time what my daughter and our family have had to live with for the last 6 months or so. Then perhaps you would understand.
Signed:Despairing Mother
Parents: What Can You Do If Your Child Is A Victim?
Many students who become victims of bullying would probably develop quite normally if they did not have to face aggressive fellow students. An essential part of counter-acting bullying in school is to stop or change the bullies’ and their accomplices’ behavior. The parents of children who are victims of bullying should not view bullying as an unavoidable part of growing up.
At the same time, it is also clear that many victims of bullying are unsure of themselves and somewhat anxious by nature, with relatively low self-confidence and few or no friends. So in some cases, it may be sensible for you to try to help your child adapt better to school life and other environments—maybe regardless of the actual bullying situation.
Steps You Can Take
Help your child strengthen his or her self-confidence, for example, by stimulating the development of any talents or positive qualities.
Help your child join other groups of children of the same age (who preferably are not in the same class at school) in sports, music, or other leisure time activities. Physical training in particular, if your child has the interest or ability, results in the child “giving out different signals” to those around him or her.
Encourage your child to make contact with (and perhaps bring home) a friendly student from the same class, or from another class. As socially excluded children often lack relationship-making skills, it is important that you, or perhaps the school counselor, help your child with concrete advice on how to go about making friends with peers.
It is important that you consistently support your child’s contacts and activity outside of the family. Try to avoid being over-protective, but keep an eye on what is going on and arrange situations that can bring about positive development.
Sometimes a child (especially the provocative victim of bullying) behaves in a way that irritates and provokes those around him or her. In such cases, you have the task of carefully, but firmly and consistently, helping your child find more suitable ways of reacting and interacting in friendship groups.
If your child exhibits some hyperactivity, it may be necessary to get extra help from a mental health professional.
Parents: What Can You Do If Your Child Is a Bully?
You will need to work closely with the school to resolve the situation. Being informed by the school or another source that your child is bullying other students may be a difficult fact to face. Making excuses and playing down your child’s behavior will not help him or her. On the contrary, you should act quickly for the sake of the victim and for your own child’s future. As mentioned earlier, children who are aggressive toward their peers are at high risk for what is known as anti-social development, including criminality and misuse of alcohol, tobacco, and illegal drugs at a later stage in their lives. It is, therefore, important to take time now to guide your child on to positive paths.
Steps You Can Take
Make it quite clear that you take bullying seriously and will not accept the continuation of this behavior. If both you and the school show consistently negative reactions to the child’s bullying, the chances that your child will change are increased.
Try to set up some simple rules for family interactions. Whenever your child follows the rules, praise him or her. If your child breaks the rules, consistently enforce some kind of negative consequence (for example, the withholding of allowance or other benefits/privileges).
Spend 15 minutes or more of quality time with your child every day. Gain thorough knowledge into who he or she is spending time with and what they are doing. It is easier for children or young people to change their aggressive behavior if they feel they are reasonably well liked and listened to by their parents/caregivers.
Help your child use his or her energy and need to dominate in a more positive way, for example, by encouraging him or her to participate in a sport like basketball or soccer, in which one must play by the rules. Explore any particular talents your child may have that can be further developed to enhance his or her self-esteem.
If these kinds of measures, and the plan that has been set up with the school, have not resulted in noticeable changes in your child’s behavior after some time, then you should get in touch with a mental health professional for more help.
What Can Schools Do?
Bullying in schools is not a problem that can be solved once and for all. Therefore, schools should maintain constant readiness to counteract any tendencies toward bullying in the school environment. This can best be achieved by having a good bullying prevention program as a standard element in the school environment. Although there are other anti-bullying programs available, the most noted program is the one developed in Norway by Dr. Dan Olweus at the University of Bergen.
The Olweus Bullying Prevention Program has been used and evaluated in large-scale studies with quite positive results in several countries, including the United States, and it has a strong research base.
The following are core elements of the Olweus program that you might want to consider when requesting, promoting, implementing, and evaluating a bullying prevention program in your school.
A Model Bullying Prevention Program
Principles and Characteristics
What helps make the Olweus program a model is that it builds on a few key principles that have been found to be important in research on the development and modification of problem behavior, especially aggressive behavior, like bullying.
First, it is important to create both a school and home environment characterized by warmth, positive interest, and involvement with adults.
Second, firm limits against unacceptable behavior need to be established.
Third, non-physical, non-hostile negative consequences (sanctions) must be applied if a youth breaks the rules that have been agreed upon.
Fourth, it is expected that the adults in the school and at home act as authorities, at least in some respects. The program is based on an authoritative (not authoritarian) model for the relationship between adults and children, where teachers are expected to be authorities with responsibility for the students’ total situation, not just their learning.
For additional information www.modelprograms.samhsa.gov
The Olweus Bullying Prevention Program
Subgoals
Increase awareness and knowledge of problems related to bullying as well as dispel a number of myths about the causes of bullying.
The use of the Olweus Bully/Victim Questionnaire in an anonymous survey is an important step toward the acquisition of more concrete information about the occurrence and forms of the problem in the individual school.
Get teachers and parents actively involved.
This means that the adults must take responsibility for controlling what is going on among the students in the school, at least to a certain extent. One aspect of this is organizing good supervision of break times. Furthermore, teachers are encouraged to intervene in situations that arouse suspicion and to give a clear message to the students: We will not accept bullying in our school, and we will make sure it’s stopped. Teachers should initiate serious discussions with victims of bullying, bullies, and their parents if a problem has been identified or is suspected. Parents and teachers must closely follow up and monitor the measures taken. Otherwise, the situation of the victim can easily decline from “bad to worse.”
Develop clear rules against bullying. The following rules have proven to be very useful:
*We will not bully other students.
*We will try to help students who are bullied.
*We will make it a point to include students who become easily left out.
*When we know somebody is being bullied, we will tell a teacher and an adult at home.
These rules can provide the basis for class discussions about what bullying is and what negative consequences should be put into effect when students break the rules. Regular class meetings are a good forum for evaluating how students relate to the set rules and whether the planned measures are working. It is important that the teacher enforce the rules consistently and also give plenty of praise when the rules are followed.
Provide support and effective protection to the victim.
If the rules are followed, students who are easily bullied usually are provided reasonably good protection. In addition, the teacher can enlist “neutral” or “well-adjusted” students in different ways to improve the situation for victims of bullying. The teacher can use his or her imagination to help bullied students stand up for themselves in appropriate ways and make themselves useful and valuable in their classmates’ eyes. The parents of bullied children can motivate them to make new friends and show them how to get to know others and how to maintain good relationships with friends.
Even though many of the measures in this school-based program do not directly involve parents, parents should know that this kind of intervention program exists and that it works. This bullying prevention program does not require large-scale investments of time or money. It is first and foremost a question of the attitudes, behaviors, and routines of the teachers and school administrators. A dramatic reduction in the extent of bullying can be achieved with a relatively simple, but carefully developed bullying prevention program.
How much bullying takes place in our schools and other youth environments depends on the role that committed adults will play in their schools, their families, and their communities.
For more information, Please visit www.samhsa.gov
So, with that in mind, I thought I would gather up some information concerning Bullying that might help parents who may be dealing with the same issues as this parent. I copied this information from www.samhsa.gov. It is from a booklet entitled, "Bullying Is Not A Fact of Life".
Bullying is a form of ABUSE.
HARASSMENT AND VIOLENCE. Harassment and abuse are more accurate names for it. Parents and school personnel should no longer consider bullying “just a part of growing up.” It is harmful to both the perpetrators and the victims and is responsible for behavioral and emotional difficulties, long-term negative outcomes, and violence.
Most people know what bullies are.
They even know what problems victims of bullies sometimes face: years of constant anxiety, insecurity, and low self-esteem. Yet bullying problems OFTEN ARE ignored or denied.
Large numbers of students have been bullied over long periods of time while nobody paid any attention! Today, however, more people are recognizing that it is a basic democratic right for a student to feel secure at school and not to be troubled by offensive and humiliating treatment. Because of highly publicized school incidents, we now know that ignoring bullying can lead to violence or make a victim feel so overwhelmed that he or she sees suicide as the only way out.
No student should be afraid to go to school because of bullying, and no parent should be worried that their child may be bullied.
Some Facts About Bullying Among Children and Young People
Generally, we call it bullying when one or more persons repeatedly say or do hurtful things to another person who has problems defending himself or herself. Direct bullying usually involves hitting, kicking, or making insults, offensive and sneering comments, or threats.
Repeatedly teasing someone who clearly shows signs of distress is also recognized as bullying. However, indirect bullying—the experience of being excluded from a group of friends, being spoken ill of and being prevented from making friends—can be just as painful.
Most bullying takes place at the same grade level. However, many times older students bully younger students. Although direct bullying is a greater problem among boys, a good deal of bullying takes place among girls. Bullying between girls, however, involves less physical violence and can be more difficult to discover. Girls tend to use indirect and subtle methods of bullying, such as exclusion from a group of friends, backbiting, and manipulation of friendships. Far more boys than girls bully, and many girls are mostly bullied by boys, but both can be victims of bullying.
These three conditions create a bullying situation:
*Negative or malicious behavior.
*Behavior repeated over a period of time.
*A relationship in which there is an imbalance in strength or power between the parties involved.
Fact: How Much Bullying Goes On?
Major studies in Norway in the 1980s and 1990s with more than 150,000 students found that about 15 percent of students in primary and lower secondary school, or approximately one in seven students, were involved in bullying with a degree of regularity—as a victim, as a bully, or both. At least 5 percent (more than 1in 20) of all students were involved in more serious bullying at least once a week.
In the United States in 1998, the prevalence of bullying was found to be even more substantial. A study carried out with a national sample of more than 15,000 students in grades 6 through 10 found about 30 percent of the sample reported moderate or frequent involvement in bullying—as a bully, as a victim, or both. Students in middle school (grades 6 through 8) reported greater frequency of bullying than did students in grades 9 and 10.
Similar results were obtained in another study of more than 6,000 middle school students in rural South Carolina. About 23 percent reported that they had been bullied by other students “several times” or more frequently during the past three months.
Approximately 20 percent reported that they had bullied other students with the same frequency.
Fact: Where Does Bullying Take Place?
The claim is sometimes made that most bullying takes place on the way to school, not at school. However, research shows that two to three times as many students are bullied at school compared to those who are bullied on the way to school.
Approximately 40 to 75 percent of bullying takes place during breaks—in the schoolyard, in the corridors, at recess, or in more secluded places, like bathrooms. It can also take place during classes unless the teacher is attentive and cracks down on any tendencies toward bullying. Without a doubt, school is the place where most bullying occurs. This puts particular responsibility on school leaders and teachers. It is clear that the behavior, attitudes, and routines of teachers and other school personnel have a decisive effect on the extent of bullying in the individual school or class. Of course, parents, caregivers and supervisors in many other places—in kindergartens, playgrounds, and sports and youth clubs, for example—also need to be alert to detect bullying or tendencies toward bullying.
Fact: Who Gets Bullied?
Research gives a fairly clear picture of those who are potential victims of bullying. They tend to have at least one, or usually several, of the characteristics listed below. These lists only indicate main trends; in some cases, victims may be quite different. Potential victims of bullying can be divided into two main groups:
The passive or submissive victim
Most children in this category are not aggressive or teasing in their manner and usually do not actively provoke others in their surroundings. However, passive victims of bullying generally signal, through their behavior and attitudes, that they are a bit anxious and unsure of themselves.
Detailed interviews with parents of bullied boys predominantly of the passive/ submissive type indicate that these boys were characteristically rather careful and sensitive from an early age. Having this kind of personality (possibly in addition to physical weakness) may have made it difficult for them to assert themselves in their group of playmates, which may have contributed to these boys becoming victims of bullying. At the same time, it is obvious that long-term bullying probably increased their anxiety, insecurity, and negative self-image.
The features that can be seen in long-suffering victims of bullying may be both a cause for, and a result of, being bullied.
*These students are usually quiet, careful, sensitive, and may start crying easily.
*They are unsure of themselves and have poor self confidence (negative self-image).
*The boys in this group do not like to fight, and they are often physically weaker than their classmates, especially the bullies.
*They have few or no friends.
The provocative victim
This category is less common and accounts for only about 10 to 20 percent of the victims.
A class with a provocative victim of bullying generally has somewhat different problems than a class with a passive victim. It is more common that a number of students, sometimes the whole class, may be involved in harassing the provocative victim.
*They may themselves try to bully weaker students.
*They can be quick tempered and may try to retaliate if they are attacked or harassed, but often without much success.
*They are often restless, clumsy, immature, unable to concentrate, and generally considered difficult.
*Some may be characterized as hyperactive (unsettled and restless because of concentration difficulties) and often have reading/writing problems.
*They may also be disliked by adults—their teacher, for example—because of their irritating behavior.
Fact: Who Bullies?
Children and young people who are potential bullies have a number of common features. Again, it must be emphasized that these points are just the main trends. All the same, it is likely that an active bully will have one or more of the following characteristics.
It has often been presumed that bullies are anxious and unsure of themselves underneath their tough surface. However, research finds that bullies are characterized by either unusually low or about average levels of anxiety and insecurity. Their self-image is also about average or even relatively positive.
Some bullies are popular, others are not. A bully will often have a group of two or three friends who provide him or her with support and often join in the bullying. However, the popularity of the bully lessens at the higher class/grade levels.
*They view violence more favorably than most students do.
*They are often aggressive toward adults, both parents and teachers.
*They have a marked need to dominate and suppress other students, to assert themselves by means of force and threats, and to get their own way.
*Boys in this group are often stronger than their peers and, in particular, their victims.
*They are often hot-tempered, impulsive, and not very tolerant of obstacles and delays (frustrations).
*They find it difficult to fit in with rules.
*They appear to be tough and show little sympathy toward students who are bullied.
*They are good at talking their way out of difficult situations.
“The Real Story”
For 2 years, Sam, a quiet 13-year-old, was a human plaything for some of his classmates. The teenagers badgered Sam for money, forced him to swallow weeds and drink sour milk, beat him up in the rest room, and tied a string around his neck and led him around as a “pet.” When Sam’s torturers were asked about the bullying, they said they pursued their victim because “it was fun.”
Fact: Group Bullying
Bullying MAY ALSO BE a group phenomenon with particular characteristics. This means that there are a number of children and young people who may at times be involved in bullying, but who would not usually take the initiative themselves. These are called passive bullies, henchmen, or bystanders. The group of passive bullies is quite mixed and may include uncertain or anxious students.
Some of the mechanisms THAT may be active in group bullying are:
Social contagion
Some students may be influenced to take part in bullying if the student leading the bullying is someone they admire. Children or young people who are themselves somewhat insecure and who want to assert themselves are mostly the ones who join in.
Weakening of normal controls
If neither the teachers nor the other students try to stop bullying, the bully or bullies are rewarded through their “victory” over their victim. This can contribute to weakening the controls against the aggressive tendencies of neutral students and may contribute to their participation in bullying.
Decreased sense of individual responsibility
Social psychology notes that a person’s sense of individual responsibility for a negative action such as bullying may be considerably reduced when several people participate. In this way, students who are usually nice, but easily influenced, can at times take part in bullying without particular misgivings.
Gradual changes in the perception of the victim of bullying
As a result of repeated attacks and degrading comments, the victim will gradually be perceived as a fairly worthless person who almost “begs to be beaten up.” This also results in lesser feelings of guilt in those who are taking part in the bullying and may be part of the explanation of why other students do not try to stop the harassment of the victim.
Q&A: How do I find out if my child is being bullied?
FIRST:
You need to have frequent conversations with your child or adolescent to ask about what happens at school. Establishing a relationship helps you keep the lines of communication open and gives you a sense of context for what your child or adolescent experiences day-to-day.
SECOND:
If you get a note from your child’s school saying that he or she is being bullied by the other students, take it seriously. The problem is, however, that you cannot always be sure that the school/teachers will discover that your child is having this sort of problem or that they realize how serious a situation is. Neither can you expect that your child will necessarily talk about problems of this nature to you. There can be various reasons for this. Your child may feel that being bullied is a personal defeat, or he or she may have received threats from the bullies. The child may have tried before to tell an adult about the bullying and may not have been given any real help. He or she may be afraid that involving adults will make the bullying even worse. Therefore, you must be particularly sensitive to signs and changes in your child.
It is important that you do not try to explain away your child’s problems and hope that they will go away by themselves. It has been clearly documented that bullying can negatively impact a child’s formative years as well as later adult life. Research suggests that systematic bullying can leave deep psychological scars which can lead to depressive attitudes and a tendency toward negative self-image, even years after the bullying has ended.
Q&A: What are the Warning Signs?
Your Child–
*Comes home with torn, dirty, or wet clothes or damaged books, or “loses” things without being able to give a proper explanation of what has happened.
*Has bruises, injuries, cuts, and scratches and cannot give a credible explanation for what caused them.
*Loses interest in school and gets poorer grades.
*Does not bring classmates home and rarely spends time with classmates after school.
*Seems afraid or unwilling to go to school in the morning.
*Chooses an “illogical” route to and from school.
*Seems unhappy, downhearted, depressed, or has mood swings with sudden outbursts of irritation or anger.
*Often has little appetite, headaches, or stomach aches.
*Sleeps restlessly with nightmares and possibly cries in his/her sleep.
*Steals or asks for extra money from members of the family (to soften up the bullies)
Q&A: How do I find out whether my child is bullying?
It can be difficult to discover and to acknowledge that your own child is a bully. Bullying other students is obviously not something a child will talk about at home. But if several of the points described under “Who Bullies?” fit your child, you should take this seriously and look more closely into the matter.
Bullying can be seen as a part of a general pattern of anti-social and rule-breaking behavior. Children who are bullies during their school years are at a much higher risk of later becoming involved in crime, misuse of alcohol, tobacco, and illegal drugs. If your child is bullying others, it is important to break this pattern, not just for the sake of the victim, but also for your own child’s sake.
Who Bullies?
Your Child–
*Has a marked need to dominate or manipulate others.
*Is aggressive, nasty, spiteful, and generally in opposition.
*Seems to like to insult, push around, or tease other children.
What Can parents Do?
If you suspect or it is obvious that your child is being bullied by other students and the school has not already informed you of the situation, then it is important that you contact the school immediately. Parents should have the right to expect the school to take this seriously and to investigate the facts in the case. This will usually involve talks with you and your child, with the suspected bully or bullies and with other students in the class. Also, if appropriate, talks with a number of other parents (for example, the parents of the bullies) who may have important information to contribute.
Once the facts are on the table, a detailed plan must be drawn up of how you and the school together can put an end to the bullying.
Although it is important that home and school work together in cases of bullying, it must be emphasized that the school should take the main responsibility to initiate and coordinate the work involved in counteracting bullying in school.
Some parents who have approached schools with their worries and suspicions about their child being bullied have had the door closed in their faces with comments such as “there isn’t any bullying at our school” or “you are worrying about nothing.” If you are reasonably sure that your child is being bullied, a good starting point for taking up the situation with the school can be to ask your child (along with you, if it seems appropriate) to keep a concise log book describing the incidents of harassment or bullying—when they occurred, who took part, and what was said and done. Then you can make a more concrete presentation when you contact the school. It can be a good idea, too, to discuss the situation with the parents of other children in the class. If they have also reported problems with bullying, it will, of course, be easier to urge the school to act.
Parents: Don’t Give Up!
Sometimes bullied students do not want their parents to talk with school officials. Victims often do not want to be the center of attention and are afraid of getting the bully into trouble by telling adults about what is going on. In many cases, these children have also been threatened with increased bullying if they tell. Threats cause many victims of bullying to suffer in silence or to pressure their parents not to contact the school.
In most cases, however, you are doing your child a dis-service if you do not pursue the issue. If your child will not agree to your suggestions out of fear, you must still take responsibility for sorting out the problem. Most bullied children eventually feel a great sense of relief when the situation finally comes out into the open. From a long-term perspective, it is also detrimental to the bullies when their behavior is overlooked. If the situation is properly dealt with, the bully will be helped, too.
Parents: Let the School Arrange a Meeting
Once bullying has been discovered, the school should contact the parents of both the victim(s) and the bullies to inform them and to try to establish constructive cooperation. Since a victim’s parents usually should not contact the bully’s parents directly, the school could arrange a meeting at which the students, as well as their parents, are present. The aim of such a meeting is to bring about a thorough discussion of the situation and to arrive at a concrete plan of action. If the bully has damaged the victim’s clothes or other possessions, it would be reasonable to bring up the question of compensation. Another aim must be to try to establish a collaboration with the parents of the bully/ies and to get them to exert their influence over their children in a purposeful way.
Many parents of students who bully others have little idea of what their child has been doing at school. When the situation is clarified for them, a number of parents want to contribute to bringing about positive changes. On the other hand, some bullies’ parents try to play down the problems and generally take a defensive stand. They may not even come to meetings designed to address the problem. Even if it is not possible to establish any reasonably positive communication with some parents, a serious attempt to do so must still be made. In any case, the bully’s parents must be kept informed about the situation.
The initial meeting should not be a one-time event. It should be followed up with more meetings so that the development of the situation can be further evaluated and information can be exchanged between parents and teachers.
It is, of course, also important to check that any decisions that have been made are being put into action. Under favorable circumstances, relatively positive relations can develop between the parents of bullies and the parents of the victim. This can be an important step in putting an end to the bullying.
Sometimes, however, it is clear in advance that the relationship between the bullies’ and the victim’s families is tense and hostile. In such situations, it is sensible to hold meetings with one family at a time before possibly arranging a joint meeting, and it may be necessary to involve the school social worker, counselor, or psychologist.
Parents: Make Sure the Bullied Child Gets Effective Protection
One thing must be made absolutely clear when an attempt is being made to resolve a bullying situation—the victim of bullying must be guaranteed effective protection. Close follow-up is needed until the danger of new attempts at bullying has passed. Teachers and school administrators have a special responsibility to safeguard the victim at school. The bullied student must be able to trust that the adults are both willing and capable of providing the help he or she needs. If bullying problems are taken up in class in a rushed or casual manner, without ensuring that the victim is given solid protection against further harassment, the situation will almost always become worse. In order to provide the bullied student with sufficient security, close cooperation and frequent exchange of information is usually needed between the school and the student’s family.
Having a child who is bullied means seeing your child become an outcast, frozen out, and completely isolated. Most of what you read is about bullies and victims who are boys. Bullying is also found among girls, but it is not so obvious from the outside. It is not usually a matter of damaged clothes or bruised arms and legs. Bullying among girls bypasses physical pain and goes right into the soul. Bullying among girls is less concrete or visible.
How can I as a mother, accuse the girls bullying my 14-year-old daughter for having stopped phoning, for not saying hello, for speaking badly of her behind her back, for changing places in the classroom, for always commenting on and making fun of what she says, etc. Nothing they do (or don’t do) is against the rules.
As a mother, I have a great sense of grief and helplessness in the face of what my daughter has to go through. In desperation, I have tried to talk to the mothers of two of my daughter’s previous friends. It wasn’t particularly helpful; some parents just can’t accept that their children are criticized by outsiders. They defend their children at any cost, no matter how ridiculous this may be.
I wouldn’t wish the grief and helplessness I feel on any parents, but I wish you and your children could actually feel just for a short time what my daughter and our family have had to live with for the last 6 months or so. Then perhaps you would understand.
Signed:Despairing Mother
Parents: What Can You Do If Your Child Is A Victim?
Many students who become victims of bullying would probably develop quite normally if they did not have to face aggressive fellow students. An essential part of counter-acting bullying in school is to stop or change the bullies’ and their accomplices’ behavior. The parents of children who are victims of bullying should not view bullying as an unavoidable part of growing up.
At the same time, it is also clear that many victims of bullying are unsure of themselves and somewhat anxious by nature, with relatively low self-confidence and few or no friends. So in some cases, it may be sensible for you to try to help your child adapt better to school life and other environments—maybe regardless of the actual bullying situation.
Steps You Can Take
Help your child strengthen his or her self-confidence, for example, by stimulating the development of any talents or positive qualities.
Help your child join other groups of children of the same age (who preferably are not in the same class at school) in sports, music, or other leisure time activities. Physical training in particular, if your child has the interest or ability, results in the child “giving out different signals” to those around him or her.
Encourage your child to make contact with (and perhaps bring home) a friendly student from the same class, or from another class. As socially excluded children often lack relationship-making skills, it is important that you, or perhaps the school counselor, help your child with concrete advice on how to go about making friends with peers.
It is important that you consistently support your child’s contacts and activity outside of the family. Try to avoid being over-protective, but keep an eye on what is going on and arrange situations that can bring about positive development.
Sometimes a child (especially the provocative victim of bullying) behaves in a way that irritates and provokes those around him or her. In such cases, you have the task of carefully, but firmly and consistently, helping your child find more suitable ways of reacting and interacting in friendship groups.
If your child exhibits some hyperactivity, it may be necessary to get extra help from a mental health professional.
Parents: What Can You Do If Your Child Is a Bully?
You will need to work closely with the school to resolve the situation. Being informed by the school or another source that your child is bullying other students may be a difficult fact to face. Making excuses and playing down your child’s behavior will not help him or her. On the contrary, you should act quickly for the sake of the victim and for your own child’s future. As mentioned earlier, children who are aggressive toward their peers are at high risk for what is known as anti-social development, including criminality and misuse of alcohol, tobacco, and illegal drugs at a later stage in their lives. It is, therefore, important to take time now to guide your child on to positive paths.
Steps You Can Take
Make it quite clear that you take bullying seriously and will not accept the continuation of this behavior. If both you and the school show consistently negative reactions to the child’s bullying, the chances that your child will change are increased.
Try to set up some simple rules for family interactions. Whenever your child follows the rules, praise him or her. If your child breaks the rules, consistently enforce some kind of negative consequence (for example, the withholding of allowance or other benefits/privileges).
Spend 15 minutes or more of quality time with your child every day. Gain thorough knowledge into who he or she is spending time with and what they are doing. It is easier for children or young people to change their aggressive behavior if they feel they are reasonably well liked and listened to by their parents/caregivers.
Help your child use his or her energy and need to dominate in a more positive way, for example, by encouraging him or her to participate in a sport like basketball or soccer, in which one must play by the rules. Explore any particular talents your child may have that can be further developed to enhance his or her self-esteem.
If these kinds of measures, and the plan that has been set up with the school, have not resulted in noticeable changes in your child’s behavior after some time, then you should get in touch with a mental health professional for more help.
What Can Schools Do?
Bullying in schools is not a problem that can be solved once and for all. Therefore, schools should maintain constant readiness to counteract any tendencies toward bullying in the school environment. This can best be achieved by having a good bullying prevention program as a standard element in the school environment. Although there are other anti-bullying programs available, the most noted program is the one developed in Norway by Dr. Dan Olweus at the University of Bergen.
The Olweus Bullying Prevention Program has been used and evaluated in large-scale studies with quite positive results in several countries, including the United States, and it has a strong research base.
The following are core elements of the Olweus program that you might want to consider when requesting, promoting, implementing, and evaluating a bullying prevention program in your school.
A Model Bullying Prevention Program
Principles and Characteristics
What helps make the Olweus program a model is that it builds on a few key principles that have been found to be important in research on the development and modification of problem behavior, especially aggressive behavior, like bullying.
First, it is important to create both a school and home environment characterized by warmth, positive interest, and involvement with adults.
Second, firm limits against unacceptable behavior need to be established.
Third, non-physical, non-hostile negative consequences (sanctions) must be applied if a youth breaks the rules that have been agreed upon.
Fourth, it is expected that the adults in the school and at home act as authorities, at least in some respects. The program is based on an authoritative (not authoritarian) model for the relationship between adults and children, where teachers are expected to be authorities with responsibility for the students’ total situation, not just their learning.
For additional information www.modelprograms.samhsa.gov
The Olweus Bullying Prevention Program
Subgoals
Increase awareness and knowledge of problems related to bullying as well as dispel a number of myths about the causes of bullying.
The use of the Olweus Bully/Victim Questionnaire in an anonymous survey is an important step toward the acquisition of more concrete information about the occurrence and forms of the problem in the individual school.
Get teachers and parents actively involved.
This means that the adults must take responsibility for controlling what is going on among the students in the school, at least to a certain extent. One aspect of this is organizing good supervision of break times. Furthermore, teachers are encouraged to intervene in situations that arouse suspicion and to give a clear message to the students: We will not accept bullying in our school, and we will make sure it’s stopped. Teachers should initiate serious discussions with victims of bullying, bullies, and their parents if a problem has been identified or is suspected. Parents and teachers must closely follow up and monitor the measures taken. Otherwise, the situation of the victim can easily decline from “bad to worse.”
Develop clear rules against bullying. The following rules have proven to be very useful:
*We will not bully other students.
*We will try to help students who are bullied.
*We will make it a point to include students who become easily left out.
*When we know somebody is being bullied, we will tell a teacher and an adult at home.
These rules can provide the basis for class discussions about what bullying is and what negative consequences should be put into effect when students break the rules. Regular class meetings are a good forum for evaluating how students relate to the set rules and whether the planned measures are working. It is important that the teacher enforce the rules consistently and also give plenty of praise when the rules are followed.
Provide support and effective protection to the victim.
If the rules are followed, students who are easily bullied usually are provided reasonably good protection. In addition, the teacher can enlist “neutral” or “well-adjusted” students in different ways to improve the situation for victims of bullying. The teacher can use his or her imagination to help bullied students stand up for themselves in appropriate ways and make themselves useful and valuable in their classmates’ eyes. The parents of bullied children can motivate them to make new friends and show them how to get to know others and how to maintain good relationships with friends.
Even though many of the measures in this school-based program do not directly involve parents, parents should know that this kind of intervention program exists and that it works. This bullying prevention program does not require large-scale investments of time or money. It is first and foremost a question of the attitudes, behaviors, and routines of the teachers and school administrators. A dramatic reduction in the extent of bullying can be achieved with a relatively simple, but carefully developed bullying prevention program.
How much bullying takes place in our schools and other youth environments depends on the role that committed adults will play in their schools, their families, and their communities.
For more information, Please visit www.samhsa.gov
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Acronyms and Special Education
I just received a phone call from a parent wanting to know what did ADA stand for. As I told her, I thought to myself that if she didn't know this familiar acronym, then maybe others don't know either.
So, with that in mind, I found several acronyms that might help all of us as we travel through our each unique paths of special education.
This all comes from the FAPE-Families and Advocates partnership for Education. Their website is www.fape.org
Acronym----------------Term
* AAC-------------Alternative Augmentative Communication
* ADA-------------Americans with Disabilities Act
* ADD/ADHD---Attention Deficit/Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
* ADLs------------Activities of Daily Living
* ADR-------------Alternative Dispute Resolution
* APE-------------Adaptive Physical Education
* ARD-------------Admission, Review, and Dismissal Committee
* ASL-------------American Sign Language
* AT--------------Assistive Technology
* BD--------------Behavioral Disorder
* CA--------------Chronological Age
* CAP-------------Corrective Action Plan
* CAPD------------Central Auditory Processing Disorder
* CF--------------Cystic Fibrosis
* CFR-------------Code of Federal Regulations
* CP--------------Cerebral Palsy
* CSPD------------Comprehensive System of Personnel Development
* CST-------------Child Study Team
* DB--------------Deaf-Blind
* DD--------------Developmental Delay
* DD Act----------Developmental Disabilities Assistance and Bill or Rights Act
* DoDDS-----------Department of Defense Dependent Schools
* DS--------------Down Syndrome
* DSM-------------Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders by the
American Psychiatric Association
* ECE-------------Early Childhood Education
* ED--------------Emotional Disturbance
* EDGAR-----------Education Department General Administrative Regulations
* EHA-------------Education of the Handicapped Act (now IDEA)
* EI--------------Early Intervention
* EMH-------------Educable Mentally Handicapped
* EMR-------------Educable Mentally Retarded
* EPSDT-----------Early Periodic Screening, Diagnosis and Treatment
* ESD-------------Extended School Day
* ESEA------------Elementary and Secondary Education Act
* ESL-------------English as a Second Language
* ESY or EYS------Extended School Year or Extended Year Services
* FAPE------------Free Appropriate Public Education; Families and Advocates
Partnership for Education
* FAS-------------Fetal Alcohol Syndrome
* FBA-------------Functional Behavioral Assessment
* FC--------------Facilitated Communication
* FEOG------------Full Educational Opportunity Goal
* FERPA-----------Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act
* FOIA------------Freedom of Information Act
* GE--------------General Education
* GT--------------Gifted and Talented
* HI--------------Hearing Impaired
* HO--------------Hearing Officer
* IA--------------Instructional Assistant
* IAES------------Interim Alternative Educational Setting
* IDEA------------Individuals with Disabilities Education Act
* IEE-------------Individualized Educational Evaluation
* IEP-------------Individualized Education Program
* IFSP------------Individualized Family Service Plan
* IHE-------------Institution of Higher Education
* ITP-------------Individualized Transition Plan
* LD--------------Learning Disability
* LEP-------------Limited English Proficiency
* LRE-------------Least Restrictive Environment
* MA--------------Mental Age
* MD--------------Muscular Dystrophy
* MD or MH--------Multiple Disabilities or Multiply Handicapped
* MMR-------------Mildly Mentally Retarded
* Mod MR----------Moderately Mentally Retarded
* MR--------------Mental Retardation
* NDT-------------Neurodevelopmental Treatment
* NPRM------------Notice of Proposed Rule Making
* OCD-------------Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
* ODD-------------Oppositional Defiant Disorder
* OHI-------------Other Health Impairment
* OI--------------Orthopedic Impairment
* O & M-----------Orientation and Mobility
* OT--------------Occupational Therapy
* PALS------------Peer-Assisted Learning System
* PASS------------Plan for Achieving Self-Support
* PBS-------------Positive Behavioral Supports
* PCA-------------Personal Care Attendant
* PD--------------Physical Disability
* PDD-------------Pervasive Developmental Disorder
* Perkins Act-----Carl Perkins Vocational and Applied Technology Education Act
* PLEP or PLP-----Present Level of Educational Performance or Present Level of Performance
* PP--------------Paraprofessional
* PS--------------Preschool
* PT--------------Physical Therapy
* RS--------------Related Services
* §---------------This symbol means “Section” as in “§ 300.7 Child with a disability”in the IDEA regulations
* SAS-------------Supplementary Aids and Services
* SB--------------Spina Bifida
* SC--------------Service Coordinator
* SE--------------Special Education
* SEAC------------Special Education Advisory Committee
* Section 504-----Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act
* SED-------------Serious Emotional Disturbance
* SI--------------Sensory Integration
* SIG-------------State Improvement Grant
* SIP-------------State Implementation Plan
* SLD-------------Specific Learning Disability
* S/L I-----------Speech/Language Impairment
* S/L P-----------Speech/Language Pathologist
* S/P D or S/P H--Severe/Profound Disability or Handicap
* SPOA------------Specific Power of Attorney
* SSDI------------Social Security Disability Income
* SSI-------------Supplemental Security Income
* SST-------------Student Study Team
* TBI-------------Traumatic Brain Injury
* TDD-------------Telecommunication Devices for the Deaf
* TMH-------------Trainable Mentally Handicapped
* TMR-------------Trainable Mentally Retarded
* TS--------------Tourette Syndrome
* T-TA------------Training and Technical Assistance
* TTY-------------Teletypewriter (phone system for the deaf)
* TWWIIA----------Ticket to Work and Work Incentives Improvement Act
* VI--------------Visual Impairment
* Voc Ed----------Vocational Education
* VR--------------Vocational Rehabilitation
Acronym-------------- Law
ADA The Americans with Disabilities Act.
The ADA prohibits discrimination on the basis of disability in the areas of employment, public transportation,telecommunications, access to public services programs, and activities of state and local governments, as well as those of commercial facilities,private businesses, and nonprofit service providers. The ADA was signed into law July 26, 1990.
CFR Code of Federal Regulations.
The rules and regulations of federal agencies as published in the Federal Register. The federal regulations for the implementation of the IDEA were published in the March 12, 1999,Federal Register, Part II, Department of Education, 34 CFR Parts 300 and 303.
DD Act Developmental Disabilities Assistance and Bill of Rights Act.
Last amended in 1994, this Act is in the 106th Congress for reauthorization. The DD Act supports state developmental disabilities councils, state protection and advocacy agencies, university-affiliated programs, and other projects of national significance to enhance the independence, productivity, integration, and inclusion of individuals with developmental disabilities.
EDGAR Education Department General Administrative Regulations.
These establish uniform administrative requirements for federal grants and
agreements awarded to institutions of higher education, hospitals, and other nonprofit organizations. Entities that apply for and receive federal grant funds must follow EDGAR regulations.
EHA Education of the Handicapped Act (now IDEA).
The name of the original 1975 legislation entitling children and youth with disabilities to a free appropriate public education.
ESEA The Elementary and Secondary Education Act.
This law contains several federal programs designed to address the needs of disadvantaged students. The largest, Title 1 (formerly Chapter 1), is an $8 billion program designed to ensure that students in high poverty schools meet high standards. The law was amended in 1994 to strengthen provisions around high state standards for all students, accountability for schools and districts that continually underperform, and strong parental involvement and quality program requirements for schools and districts receiving Title 1 funds. The law is currently in the process of being reauthorized.
FERPA Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act.
Legislation giving parents the right to inspect and review their child’s educational records, to amend errors or inaccuracies in those records, and to consent to disclosure of records.
FOIA Freedom of Information Act.
Enacted in 1966, this law entitles any person to the right to request access to federal agency records or information. There are some exemptions and exclusions that apply. Nearly all state governments have FOIA-type statutes that apply to state and local public agencies.
IDEA Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (formerly EHA).
This law states that children with disabilities have the right to a free
appropriate public education, including procedural protections and the right to an education that is standards based. The latest amendments to this special education law were passed in 1997.
NPRM Notice of Proposed Rule Making.
Whenever a federal agency proposes to publish new or amended regulations to enact a law (such as IDEA)the proposed regulations are issued in the Federal Register for public review and comment. The NPRM designation indicates that these are proposed regulations, out for public comment. Once finalized, regulations are published in the Federal Register as Final Rules and Regulations.
PASS Plan for Achieving Self-Support.
A part of the SSI statute that permits the exclusion of income and resources of individuals who are blind or disabled, if an individual needs such income/resources to fulfill an approved PASS. PASS allows income to be set aside in order to reach a goal toward independence, such as starting a business, going to school, or obtaining training for a job. PASS set-aside money does not reduce SSI benefits.
The Perkins Act The Carl Perkins Vocational and Applied Technology Education Act of 1998.
The purpose of this act is to develop more fully the academic,vocational, and technical skills of secondary and postsecondary students who choose to enroll in vocational and technical education programs. The act applies to the general population and to the following special populations: individuals with disabilities; individuals from economically disadvantaged families, including foster children; individuals preparing for nontraditional training and employment; single parents; single pregnant women; displaced homemakers; and individuals with limited English proficiency.
§ This symbol means “Section” as in “§300.7 Child with a disability” as written in the IDEA regulations.
Section 504 Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act.
A civil rights statute designed to eliminate discrimination on the basis of disability in any program or activity receiving federal financial assistance. Some individuals who do not qualify for services under IDEA may receive services and/or accommodations under Section 504.
SSDI Social Security Disability Income.
Cash benefits paid to individuals who are blind or have other disabilities and who have previously worked under (i.e., paid into) Social Security.
SSI Supplemental Security Income.
A supplemental cash benefits program administered by the Social Security Administration for individuals who are blind or have other disabilities who have little or no income or resources.
TWWIIA Ticket to Work and Work Incentives Improvement Act of 1999.
Landmark legislation enabling individuals with disabilities to become employed without losing Medicare or Medicaid coverage provided to those who are unemployed and receiving Social Security Disability Insurance and/or Supplemental Security Income. This act allows individuals to buy into these coverages when they stop receiving disability benefits upon gainful employment. Other provisions of the act give individuals the ability to obtain vocational rehabilitation and/or other support services.
So, with that in mind, I found several acronyms that might help all of us as we travel through our each unique paths of special education.
This all comes from the FAPE-Families and Advocates partnership for Education. Their website is www.fape.org
Acronym----------------Term
* AAC-------------Alternative Augmentative Communication
* ADA-------------Americans with Disabilities Act
* ADD/ADHD---Attention Deficit/Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
* ADLs------------Activities of Daily Living
* ADR-------------Alternative Dispute Resolution
* APE-------------Adaptive Physical Education
* ARD-------------Admission, Review, and Dismissal Committee
* ASL-------------American Sign Language
* AT--------------Assistive Technology
* BD--------------Behavioral Disorder
* CA--------------Chronological Age
* CAP-------------Corrective Action Plan
* CAPD------------Central Auditory Processing Disorder
* CF--------------Cystic Fibrosis
* CFR-------------Code of Federal Regulations
* CP--------------Cerebral Palsy
* CSPD------------Comprehensive System of Personnel Development
* CST-------------Child Study Team
* DB--------------Deaf-Blind
* DD--------------Developmental Delay
* DD Act----------Developmental Disabilities Assistance and Bill or Rights Act
* DoDDS-----------Department of Defense Dependent Schools
* DS--------------Down Syndrome
* DSM-------------Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders by the
American Psychiatric Association
* ECE-------------Early Childhood Education
* ED--------------Emotional Disturbance
* EDGAR-----------Education Department General Administrative Regulations
* EHA-------------Education of the Handicapped Act (now IDEA)
* EI--------------Early Intervention
* EMH-------------Educable Mentally Handicapped
* EMR-------------Educable Mentally Retarded
* EPSDT-----------Early Periodic Screening, Diagnosis and Treatment
* ESD-------------Extended School Day
* ESEA------------Elementary and Secondary Education Act
* ESL-------------English as a Second Language
* ESY or EYS------Extended School Year or Extended Year Services
* FAPE------------Free Appropriate Public Education; Families and Advocates
Partnership for Education
* FAS-------------Fetal Alcohol Syndrome
* FBA-------------Functional Behavioral Assessment
* FC--------------Facilitated Communication
* FEOG------------Full Educational Opportunity Goal
* FERPA-----------Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act
* FOIA------------Freedom of Information Act
* GE--------------General Education
* GT--------------Gifted and Talented
* HI--------------Hearing Impaired
* HO--------------Hearing Officer
* IA--------------Instructional Assistant
* IAES------------Interim Alternative Educational Setting
* IDEA------------Individuals with Disabilities Education Act
* IEE-------------Individualized Educational Evaluation
* IEP-------------Individualized Education Program
* IFSP------------Individualized Family Service Plan
* IHE-------------Institution of Higher Education
* ITP-------------Individualized Transition Plan
* LD--------------Learning Disability
* LEP-------------Limited English Proficiency
* LRE-------------Least Restrictive Environment
* MA--------------Mental Age
* MD--------------Muscular Dystrophy
* MD or MH--------Multiple Disabilities or Multiply Handicapped
* MMR-------------Mildly Mentally Retarded
* Mod MR----------Moderately Mentally Retarded
* MR--------------Mental Retardation
* NDT-------------Neurodevelopmental Treatment
* NPRM------------Notice of Proposed Rule Making
* OCD-------------Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
* ODD-------------Oppositional Defiant Disorder
* OHI-------------Other Health Impairment
* OI--------------Orthopedic Impairment
* O & M-----------Orientation and Mobility
* OT--------------Occupational Therapy
* PALS------------Peer-Assisted Learning System
* PASS------------Plan for Achieving Self-Support
* PBS-------------Positive Behavioral Supports
* PCA-------------Personal Care Attendant
* PD--------------Physical Disability
* PDD-------------Pervasive Developmental Disorder
* Perkins Act-----Carl Perkins Vocational and Applied Technology Education Act
* PLEP or PLP-----Present Level of Educational Performance or Present Level of Performance
* PP--------------Paraprofessional
* PS--------------Preschool
* PT--------------Physical Therapy
* RS--------------Related Services
* §---------------This symbol means “Section” as in “§ 300.7 Child with a disability”in the IDEA regulations
* SAS-------------Supplementary Aids and Services
* SB--------------Spina Bifida
* SC--------------Service Coordinator
* SE--------------Special Education
* SEAC------------Special Education Advisory Committee
* Section 504-----Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act
* SED-------------Serious Emotional Disturbance
* SI--------------Sensory Integration
* SIG-------------State Improvement Grant
* SIP-------------State Implementation Plan
* SLD-------------Specific Learning Disability
* S/L I-----------Speech/Language Impairment
* S/L P-----------Speech/Language Pathologist
* S/P D or S/P H--Severe/Profound Disability or Handicap
* SPOA------------Specific Power of Attorney
* SSDI------------Social Security Disability Income
* SSI-------------Supplemental Security Income
* SST-------------Student Study Team
* TBI-------------Traumatic Brain Injury
* TDD-------------Telecommunication Devices for the Deaf
* TMH-------------Trainable Mentally Handicapped
* TMR-------------Trainable Mentally Retarded
* TS--------------Tourette Syndrome
* T-TA------------Training and Technical Assistance
* TTY-------------Teletypewriter (phone system for the deaf)
* TWWIIA----------Ticket to Work and Work Incentives Improvement Act
* VI--------------Visual Impairment
* Voc Ed----------Vocational Education
* VR--------------Vocational Rehabilitation
Acronym-------------- Law
ADA The Americans with Disabilities Act.
The ADA prohibits discrimination on the basis of disability in the areas of employment, public transportation,telecommunications, access to public services programs, and activities of state and local governments, as well as those of commercial facilities,private businesses, and nonprofit service providers. The ADA was signed into law July 26, 1990.
CFR Code of Federal Regulations.
The rules and regulations of federal agencies as published in the Federal Register. The federal regulations for the implementation of the IDEA were published in the March 12, 1999,Federal Register, Part II, Department of Education, 34 CFR Parts 300 and 303.
DD Act Developmental Disabilities Assistance and Bill of Rights Act.
Last amended in 1994, this Act is in the 106th Congress for reauthorization. The DD Act supports state developmental disabilities councils, state protection and advocacy agencies, university-affiliated programs, and other projects of national significance to enhance the independence, productivity, integration, and inclusion of individuals with developmental disabilities.
EDGAR Education Department General Administrative Regulations.
These establish uniform administrative requirements for federal grants and
agreements awarded to institutions of higher education, hospitals, and other nonprofit organizations. Entities that apply for and receive federal grant funds must follow EDGAR regulations.
EHA Education of the Handicapped Act (now IDEA).
The name of the original 1975 legislation entitling children and youth with disabilities to a free appropriate public education.
ESEA The Elementary and Secondary Education Act.
This law contains several federal programs designed to address the needs of disadvantaged students. The largest, Title 1 (formerly Chapter 1), is an $8 billion program designed to ensure that students in high poverty schools meet high standards. The law was amended in 1994 to strengthen provisions around high state standards for all students, accountability for schools and districts that continually underperform, and strong parental involvement and quality program requirements for schools and districts receiving Title 1 funds. The law is currently in the process of being reauthorized.
FERPA Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act.
Legislation giving parents the right to inspect and review their child’s educational records, to amend errors or inaccuracies in those records, and to consent to disclosure of records.
FOIA Freedom of Information Act.
Enacted in 1966, this law entitles any person to the right to request access to federal agency records or information. There are some exemptions and exclusions that apply. Nearly all state governments have FOIA-type statutes that apply to state and local public agencies.
IDEA Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (formerly EHA).
This law states that children with disabilities have the right to a free
appropriate public education, including procedural protections and the right to an education that is standards based. The latest amendments to this special education law were passed in 1997.
NPRM Notice of Proposed Rule Making.
Whenever a federal agency proposes to publish new or amended regulations to enact a law (such as IDEA)the proposed regulations are issued in the Federal Register for public review and comment. The NPRM designation indicates that these are proposed regulations, out for public comment. Once finalized, regulations are published in the Federal Register as Final Rules and Regulations.
PASS Plan for Achieving Self-Support.
A part of the SSI statute that permits the exclusion of income and resources of individuals who are blind or disabled, if an individual needs such income/resources to fulfill an approved PASS. PASS allows income to be set aside in order to reach a goal toward independence, such as starting a business, going to school, or obtaining training for a job. PASS set-aside money does not reduce SSI benefits.
The Perkins Act The Carl Perkins Vocational and Applied Technology Education Act of 1998.
The purpose of this act is to develop more fully the academic,vocational, and technical skills of secondary and postsecondary students who choose to enroll in vocational and technical education programs. The act applies to the general population and to the following special populations: individuals with disabilities; individuals from economically disadvantaged families, including foster children; individuals preparing for nontraditional training and employment; single parents; single pregnant women; displaced homemakers; and individuals with limited English proficiency.
§ This symbol means “Section” as in “§300.7 Child with a disability” as written in the IDEA regulations.
Section 504 Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act.
A civil rights statute designed to eliminate discrimination on the basis of disability in any program or activity receiving federal financial assistance. Some individuals who do not qualify for services under IDEA may receive services and/or accommodations under Section 504.
SSDI Social Security Disability Income.
Cash benefits paid to individuals who are blind or have other disabilities and who have previously worked under (i.e., paid into) Social Security.
SSI Supplemental Security Income.
A supplemental cash benefits program administered by the Social Security Administration for individuals who are blind or have other disabilities who have little or no income or resources.
TWWIIA Ticket to Work and Work Incentives Improvement Act of 1999.
Landmark legislation enabling individuals with disabilities to become employed without losing Medicare or Medicaid coverage provided to those who are unemployed and receiving Social Security Disability Insurance and/or Supplemental Security Income. This act allows individuals to buy into these coverages when they stop receiving disability benefits upon gainful employment. Other provisions of the act give individuals the ability to obtain vocational rehabilitation and/or other support services.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Eligibility Criteria for TEFRA Medicaid...
I was speaking to a parent today about the TEFRA Medicaid program & she was asking me how do you become eligible to receive it for your child. So, I thought this would be a great topic for one of our POPS blogs. This is alittle information about the TEFRA Medicaid program that was provided to me by PROParents of SC. I hope this helps you & your family. Please double click the photos to enlarge them for viewing..
Friday, March 27, 2009
Accommodations in the Classroom...
I was talking to a parent a few days ago & she was telling me that she didn't really know what to ask for concerning accommodations for her son in the IEP meeting.. So, I thought this would be a great topic for one of our blogs. Here is a list of some accommodations that might be good to ask for concerning your child..This is just a list of some, not all, accommodations that might help your child in the classroom.
Look over them & pick the ones that would help your child the most & ask for them in a written letter form while attending the IEP meeting or mail it certified to them before hand, or give it to them while attending the meeting. If the educators refuse to do any of your request, then ask for a "Prior Written Notice" letter. This is a letter that states why they are refusing to accommodate your child in the classroom.
For Example: If you go into the IEP meeting & ask for a calculator for your son to use in the classroom. You strongly believe that this calculator could really help your son, but the educators refuse to agree. Then you say," Since we agree to disagree, then I would like a "Prior Written Notice" letter stating why you disagree with my request."
REMEMBER: The public school system is considered "Paper Driven". Which means, they have to have paper documents for everything. Which again means, if they are supposed to do something, It must be in writing before they will actually do it.
So, it may be worth your while to write down as many of the accommodations that might help your child & give that list in a written letter form to your child's teachers, the district's Student Services Director, & make sure you keep a copy for yourself before or during the IEP meeting.
If they refuse to do your accommodations that you suggested, Then you ask for the "Prior Written Notice" letter. This is a letter for your records just incase later on you need to call Protection & Advocacy or any other attorney.
Example of a Written Letter form letter:
If you feel that your child is having trouble in Math & you want to give him/her the accommodation of having a calculator in his/her Math class.
Then write a letter like this: Example:
Dear Ms( Teacher), Ms( Principal) and so on,
It is my concern that ( your child's name) is having trouble in Math & due to his/her diagnoses of (your child's diagnoses), I believe that he/she would benefit from using a calculator during the Math drills in Math class. This will help him/her by, blah blah blah.etc...
Sincerely,
Mr.or Ms. So & So
I hope this helps you in receiving the accommodations that your child needs in order for them to succeed. Please double click on the accommodation photos below in order to make them larger for viewing.
Look over them & pick the ones that would help your child the most & ask for them in a written letter form while attending the IEP meeting or mail it certified to them before hand, or give it to them while attending the meeting. If the educators refuse to do any of your request, then ask for a "Prior Written Notice" letter. This is a letter that states why they are refusing to accommodate your child in the classroom.
For Example: If you go into the IEP meeting & ask for a calculator for your son to use in the classroom. You strongly believe that this calculator could really help your son, but the educators refuse to agree. Then you say," Since we agree to disagree, then I would like a "Prior Written Notice" letter stating why you disagree with my request."
REMEMBER: The public school system is considered "Paper Driven". Which means, they have to have paper documents for everything. Which again means, if they are supposed to do something, It must be in writing before they will actually do it.
So, it may be worth your while to write down as many of the accommodations that might help your child & give that list in a written letter form to your child's teachers, the district's Student Services Director, & make sure you keep a copy for yourself before or during the IEP meeting.
If they refuse to do your accommodations that you suggested, Then you ask for the "Prior Written Notice" letter. This is a letter for your records just incase later on you need to call Protection & Advocacy or any other attorney.
Example of a Written Letter form letter:
If you feel that your child is having trouble in Math & you want to give him/her the accommodation of having a calculator in his/her Math class.
Then write a letter like this: Example:
Dear Ms( Teacher), Ms( Principal) and so on,
It is my concern that ( your child's name) is having trouble in Math & due to his/her diagnoses of (your child's diagnoses), I believe that he/she would benefit from using a calculator during the Math drills in Math class. This will help him/her by, blah blah blah.etc...
Sincerely,
Mr.or Ms. So & So
I hope this helps you in receiving the accommodations that your child needs in order for them to succeed. Please double click on the accommodation photos below in order to make them larger for viewing.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Our Communication skills.....
I was just speaking with a parent concerning how she communicates to the public school system educators about her son's IEP issues.. She told me that she didn't really communicate with them at all.. She feels as though they never listen to her or her concerns.
So, I thought this would be a great topic for one of our blogs on our website. This information was actually in one of my PROParents binders that I obtained from one of their wonderful workshops that I attended months ago. I hope this information will help you & your family become a better communicator on behalf of your child.
What is Communication??
Communication is a relationship between two or more parties, which is 55% speaking and writing and 45% body language, gestures, etc.. A good communication relationship can lead to the sharing of attitudes, concerns, ideas, & opinions.
Communication between parents & others exists on several basics:
* There will always be differences of opinion about children
* All conflicts will eventually be resolved
* People are OK, but their behavior may not be
* To win does not always mean to take ALL
* It helps to think positively
Ways To See Authority:
The Webster’s dictionary defines authority as, “ power to influence thought, opinion or behavior… persons in command… a convincing force.”
When dealing with the special needs of your child, this authority can seem to be a stumbling block or obstacle. No ONE individual has full authority over the needs of YOUR child. It is a team effort. Teams members come from varying backgrounds and areas of expertise; each very important, but only a part of the WHOLE picture. YOU, as a parent, are an IMPORTANT member of the team; YOU ARE THE EXPERT ON YOUR OWN CHILD.
Communicating at an IEP Meeting;
As parents of a child with disabilities it is very necessary for you to KNOW the educational laws and to be able to communicate effectively with educators to obtain an appropriate educational program.
At an IEP meeting effective communication involves:
* Expressing facts about your child’s educational & social needs
* Expressing feelings and opinions about your concerns
* Maintaining your personal and legal rights
Using communication and listening skills allows you to gain more information about:
* Educational options and the actions and feelings of other members of the IEP team. Such information can help you assist in problem solving
* Be a part of a decision making team
Some suggestions for communication techniques:
* BE DIRECT- direct your comments to the person for whom the message is intended; do not communicate through a third person
* BE CONSISTENT- what you feel and say should match your non-verbal behavior
* BE ACCEPTING- accept and admit your own feelings and do not try to push them on someone else
* BE CONFIDENT- make request without feeling guilty or intimidated
* BE INVOLVED- ask questions about testing, terminology, programs, participate in discussions about your child’s needs
Non-assertive and aggressive responses do not foster a positive working team approach or focus on the individual needs of your child.
AVOID NON-ASSERTIVE RESPONSES-
* Avoid agreeing with everything said
* Avoid feeling afraid to make demands
AVOID AGGRESSIVE RESPONSES-
* Avoid belittling others
* Avoid being defensive
* Avoid dominating the case conference
* Avoid being manipulative
Tips on being Assertive:
* Say what you really want to say
* Be specific and to the point
* Be firm, be persistent
* Use “I” statements
* Describe your feelings
* Be aware of your voice- volume & tone
* Maintain good eye contact
* Relax
* Avoid nervous laughter, jokes, and gestures
* Avoid whining, pleading, screaming, and sarcasm
Don’t Forget To Listen:
Communication has two sides- You also have to be willing to listen. Listening is a skill and has to be learned. Listening is giving your attention to another person so you can take in what is being said. Communicating assertive and really listening can make it possible for a real partnership to develop!!
Listening tips:
* Stop talking
* Wait to hear what is being said
* Turn off your “negative feelings” about the person
* Don’t jump to conclusions
* Ask questions
You must learn to negotiate effectively:
Negotiation: Is a give & take; it is not a debate.
Negotiation should improve the relationship between both parties.
Negotiation is back & forth communication designed to reach agreement when two or more parties have some interests in common and some that are opposed.
In every negotiation, three crucial perceptions are generally present: Information, Time, & Power.
All power is based on perception. If you think you have it, then you have it. If you think you do not have it, even if you have it, then you do not have it. In short, you have more power if you BELIEVE you have power and view your life’s encounters as negotiations.
If you would like to have more information on Communication, Please contact PRO-Parents at (803) 772-5688 or 1-800-759-4776 or email at PROparents@aol.com
So, I thought this would be a great topic for one of our blogs on our website. This information was actually in one of my PROParents binders that I obtained from one of their wonderful workshops that I attended months ago. I hope this information will help you & your family become a better communicator on behalf of your child.
What is Communication??
Communication is a relationship between two or more parties, which is 55% speaking and writing and 45% body language, gestures, etc.. A good communication relationship can lead to the sharing of attitudes, concerns, ideas, & opinions.
Communication between parents & others exists on several basics:
* There will always be differences of opinion about children
* All conflicts will eventually be resolved
* People are OK, but their behavior may not be
* To win does not always mean to take ALL
* It helps to think positively
Ways To See Authority:
The Webster’s dictionary defines authority as, “ power to influence thought, opinion or behavior… persons in command… a convincing force.”
When dealing with the special needs of your child, this authority can seem to be a stumbling block or obstacle. No ONE individual has full authority over the needs of YOUR child. It is a team effort. Teams members come from varying backgrounds and areas of expertise; each very important, but only a part of the WHOLE picture. YOU, as a parent, are an IMPORTANT member of the team; YOU ARE THE EXPERT ON YOUR OWN CHILD.
Communicating at an IEP Meeting;
As parents of a child with disabilities it is very necessary for you to KNOW the educational laws and to be able to communicate effectively with educators to obtain an appropriate educational program.
At an IEP meeting effective communication involves:
* Expressing facts about your child’s educational & social needs
* Expressing feelings and opinions about your concerns
* Maintaining your personal and legal rights
Using communication and listening skills allows you to gain more information about:
* Educational options and the actions and feelings of other members of the IEP team. Such information can help you assist in problem solving
* Be a part of a decision making team
Some suggestions for communication techniques:
* BE DIRECT- direct your comments to the person for whom the message is intended; do not communicate through a third person
* BE CONSISTENT- what you feel and say should match your non-verbal behavior
* BE ACCEPTING- accept and admit your own feelings and do not try to push them on someone else
* BE CONFIDENT- make request without feeling guilty or intimidated
* BE INVOLVED- ask questions about testing, terminology, programs, participate in discussions about your child’s needs
Non-assertive and aggressive responses do not foster a positive working team approach or focus on the individual needs of your child.
AVOID NON-ASSERTIVE RESPONSES-
* Avoid agreeing with everything said
* Avoid feeling afraid to make demands
AVOID AGGRESSIVE RESPONSES-
* Avoid belittling others
* Avoid being defensive
* Avoid dominating the case conference
* Avoid being manipulative
Tips on being Assertive:
* Say what you really want to say
* Be specific and to the point
* Be firm, be persistent
* Use “I” statements
* Describe your feelings
* Be aware of your voice- volume & tone
* Maintain good eye contact
* Relax
* Avoid nervous laughter, jokes, and gestures
* Avoid whining, pleading, screaming, and sarcasm
Don’t Forget To Listen:
Communication has two sides- You also have to be willing to listen. Listening is a skill and has to be learned. Listening is giving your attention to another person so you can take in what is being said. Communicating assertive and really listening can make it possible for a real partnership to develop!!
Listening tips:
* Stop talking
* Wait to hear what is being said
* Turn off your “negative feelings” about the person
* Don’t jump to conclusions
* Ask questions
You must learn to negotiate effectively:
Negotiation: Is a give & take; it is not a debate.
Negotiation should improve the relationship between both parties.
Negotiation is back & forth communication designed to reach agreement when two or more parties have some interests in common and some that are opposed.
In every negotiation, three crucial perceptions are generally present: Information, Time, & Power.
All power is based on perception. If you think you have it, then you have it. If you think you do not have it, even if you have it, then you do not have it. In short, you have more power if you BELIEVE you have power and view your life’s encounters as negotiations.
If you would like to have more information on Communication, Please contact PRO-Parents at (803) 772-5688 or 1-800-759-4776 or email at PROparents@aol.com
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
What exactly is Assistive Technology??
A parent called me today and wanted to ask, "What exactly is Assistive Technology??" So after speaking to her, I thought this would be a great topic for our POPS Blog.. I found this information in a few of my educational database materials that I have at home.. This actually was given to me by the SC Assistive Technology Program (SCATP) in Columbia. Please double click the pictures to make them larger to view...
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